Sarvam Krishnarpanam

If God is not real, Wat in life is?!

The one memory of Him that i remember from my first ten yrs of life was during one of my birthdays.. My mom gave me a wash n made me wear my new clothes n said, "we r going to meet God!" I cldnt believe God was just the piece of stone that everyone was bowing to.. but i loved the sound of those bells!! In fact, i ran from one end to the other end of the temple.. I jumped up to reach n ring the bell so many times n the old pandit commented wid a smile! "The God sitting in the sky has heard u ma, now stop!!" Hmmm, thought my mind.. God stayed in the sky.. Sky is there all the time n it is everywhere! So He too must b present everywhere all the time!! The syllogism was permanently put in place within my head..

From that day onwards, the adults in my house seemed precoccupied wid life.. but life was all that preoccupied me.. I wondered, sitting alone on my terrace, who made the beautiful sea? n.. n.. who made the waves dance?! also, who made sure the waters shld stop at a particular place.. just a lil beyond our locality, so that we never got drowned!?

Where did night go when day came? If the sun gives our universe light, who gives the sun the light?? Wat glue is used to stick the stars in the sky, n then suddenly, y, oh y, does one of them fall sometimes??? N the simple answer to all this was Him.. Yes.. Who else but Him!!?? He was a superpower to me.. My God was real.. If he wasnt, then who had created everything n who took such great care of everything???

He became a need when i entered adolescence.. I needed him!!! Especially that night when we went for a wedding n an uncle commented, "Archith wont have a problem wid his wedding but u r so dark n ugly. who will marry u?".. Especially when my friends told me i wasnt speaking articulate english then to b friends wid them.. Especially when to b accepted in a group i would need to b all kewl n hip n i had no clues how.. Insecure abt everything, the only thing that kept me going was the security that there was someone called God who loved me as i was. He was real.. If he wasnt, who was He, who told me am amazing just when i needed it the most??

The professional world made Him a necessity too.. While i was working for this MNC when i didnt know head or tail of anything n it was a wild goose chase.. Especially when i had to change my line of profession n all the insecurities that followed wid it.. In this constant change, all that constantly remained unchanged was Him n i felt grt relief in going to Him at the end of the night n asking him to take care of me.. God was real..

The defining moment in my rship wid Him came when mom was lying in the hospital n i was left at home, alone to myself.. pacing up n down, not knowing how to handle my frenzzied thoughts n me.. I wondered.. cldnt i just go to sleep n wake up to find that this was a nightmare? I knew i wldnt b able to live even a moment widout my mom.. she was EVERYTHING to me.. wat wld i do if something happened to her? n then i heard his voice.. I wondered if i was hallucinating when someone whispered in my mind n said.. "I am wid u, now n forever n thats all u need to go on with life."

I felt such security, such peace in those moments that i knew i wld b able to take whatever life handed to me coz.. life was itself wid me! I was prepared for the best.. n the worst!! when i recieved a call from Appa.. Mom had woken up n Appa was all smiles..

God was real.. If he wasnt, then who had gently reminded me of his presence??

Everything that has happened in my life since then - the good, the better n the best, has been the fringe benefits of realising that He is the real force pulsating within my life.. Everything in my life has happened coz He is as real to me as is my name, my face or these words..

When i throw my hands up in frustration, He takes them in His own n tells me its ok!

When i extend my hand towards him, he is quick to tell me he is there for me..

When i hold my hands up in gratitude, he sits right next to me n tells me he loves me!

N in those moments of absolute silence, when i fold my hands in prayer, he hugs me so intimately that i forget where he ends n where i begin!

My God is real!

P.s. Thank u Megha Bajaj for mirroring my thoughts so well, that i had to borrow a lot of ur skeleton, flesh n blood!

wats the point?

Wats the point of food when theres no hunger

n

Wats the point of a road when theres no way

Wats the point of light when theres no sight

Wats the point of war when theres no enemy

Wats the point of God when theres no trouble

The road comes free

I walked the bustling parthasarathi kovil street,
with the blazing sun setting low, orange'ing' everything.
my lunch bag in one hand n books in the other,

Chattering to no end with my best friends.

I walked through the unknown roads in ooty,

fingers clutched together wid cold n fear, hoping to dissolve into nothingness.

cold coz i didnt know ooty wld b so freezing,

fear coz i didnt know ill flunk my 10th math.

I walked almost the entire stretch of R.K.Saalai

oblivious of all the cars n buses n bikes n cycles riding beside me.

smiling at everyone n laughing for the silliest jokes,

holding in my hand, my admission card for college.

I walked through the solitary lanes in kalakshetra,

amidst the beautiful tress n birds n lot of peace.

listening to my rhythmic foot steps time to time

I wished i had someone walking with me n hold my hand.

I walked the long roads in goa,

dancing, singing n shouting with vigor.

Knowing not whether to grasp the beaches n its people,

or just give in to the inner child that lay within me.

I walked the small connecting roads in besant nagar,

trying to express something that i knew was extremely dear.

like how the waves come n go with no promises,

life also moves on with no pit stops.

heyheyhey

I walked round n round around my flats,

trying to blank my head n make time stop.

the breeze cooled the heat in my head,

the rain after just drenched me n my thoughts.

I walked down marine drive,

happy high after a night of partying with bro n friends.

watching the dark waves splashing on the rocks,

just happy that life is good, atleast for this moment.

I walked down the side lanes in guruvaayur,

knowing one invisible person was following me.

i didnt have to turn to find a peacock feathered flutist behind me,

cos i cld hear him calling out inspite of me not seeing him.

I walked the whirling footpaths in theosophical society

with green, green n more green till my eyes could reach.

i knew then that sometime before i said goodbye,

i wld wanna leave behind something like this n more.

Walking through the roads never mattered,

but walking with whom always did.

life, i have noticed, may never remain the same,

so walk.. coz the road comes free.

Wats with 25

1. Is a prefect square

2. Is the atomic number of manganese

3. Represents the universal word of God, according to Abellio

4. The number of years of marriage marked in a silver wedding anniversary

5. The number of cents in a quarter

6. Is a song by Verusa Salt

7. The minimum pass mark in school

8. The number of points required to win a set in volley ball under rally scoring rules

9. The number of french department doubs

10. Is a centered octogonal number

11. Is an automorphic number

12. The number of days taken for the Sun to do a complete rotation on itself

13. Has an aliquot sum of 6

14. Is the first number to have an aliquot sequence that does not culminate in 0 through a prime

15. Is of cardinal importance in Ezekiel's temple vision

16. Is the dial code of Nanjing, China

17. 25-Hydroxy vitamin D test is the most accurate way to measure how much vitamin D is in ur body

18. The minimum age of candidates in for election to the united states of representatives

19. The usual TCP port of SMTP

20. The per second frame rate of the PAL video standard

21. The designation of the M25 london orbital motorway

22. The name of the national board game of Ireland and India (Panchisi - in India)

23. Is the number of precepts of Mahavirain jainism

24. Is the minimum marriageable age for Men

25. My age as of today

To rot or not to rot

Have u heard of the butterfly effect in chaos theory? if the conditions played right, a lone butterfly cld cause a destructive tornado?

If u have.. good for u.. read further..

If u havent.. good for me.. read further (but do google about it later) to get a different dimension of the same concept..

Part 1

Somehow, earth being the only planet with life is just too over whelming.. (to an extent it may not b true as well.. science keeps re-inventing n re-correcting itself all the time.. I wont b surprised if i hear later that moon had life all along!)

But keeping current facts and conditions in mind, one can say that life on earth began from water.. N the reason y scientists say earth is the only place to have life is coz this is the only place, atleast in the solar system, that can make 2 atoms of hydrogen n 1 atom of oxygen to 1 molecule of water.. the universal solvent.. the elixir for life on earth..

N mind u, its not so simple for 2 atoms of hydrogen n 1 atom of oxygen to readily fuse n make water.. our planet is also strategically placed from the sun, which can make these molecules just right..

Also, heat n water automatically changes the character of things.. The water formed out of heat, i.e, the moisture content reacts with watever it is present in n makes fresh life in it, changing the character of the object.. this is the reason y things get decomposed.. n u can even direct it to a change that u desire.. like fermenting milk to curd under the right heat..

All of the above is information we all grew up with..

Part 2

Wat r we, humans?

As much as it may disappoint a few, Humans rnt God..

I think the concept of God is just pure energy.. So 'God' passes through all of us.. we connect to God at different levels.. Since one connects more than another doesnt mean they r God n the others rnt.. Calling anyone specifically God, is like calling an Air Conditioner which consumes more power, the full source of electricity, compared to a ceiling fan.. N frankly, a ceiling fan n electricity left to themselves, may really b of no use either..

Ok, sorry to have gone so much off track.. getting back to business.. humans separately rnt God..

Humans have decided they rnt animals as well inspite of biologically being one.. n thats only cos we can think.. we did bring in some fresh air to life in jungle by inventing the wheel n a language to communicate with for starters.. (N thats y the more u get to know people, the more u like animals!!!)

But i think, the one characteristic that really differentiates humans and animals is, animals adapt themselves to their surroundings.. humans adapt or change their surroundings to live in it.. this characteristic has made humans spread across the planet and multiple n build their clan.. they r even looking for options in near by planets.. expansion at its best!

Surprisingly, this is the exact characteristic that a viral being employs.. it brings in a major change to where it lives and in the process expands itself further and makes the change more dominant..

Part 3

If moisture is wat makes life, then planet earth is probably one of the many minutest of things in the universe bringing in a change to the bigger scheme of things.. N the universe is probably one of the many atoms of something.. N there mayb many many other such atoms developing such a change.. that 'something' mayb as simple as bread or as complicated as someother living being..

And.. And i think, the reason for this change, though not fully but a very small portion of it, is to be dedicated to the self glorified viral beings of planet earth.. The Human beings!

So next time, if u were ever to ask urself y u are put here on earth or even feel useless.. just remember..

U r one of the smallest of viral beings, bringing in ur share of change to the bigger scheme of things..

life lessons

I learnt 2 very important lessons yesterday,

1. When u have a baby at home, the temptation to be his favourite by spoiling him once in a while overrides disciplining him! dont hate babies n their parents so easily.

2. You can grow old right in front of your eyes. Never take ur health for granted.

Happy republic Day

Am a patriot.. Am SO FREAKIN PROUD to be an Indian woman.. Am proud my grandfather was a freedom fighter and he fought so hard to free this nation.. he had his own press to publicise wat he believed in.. he was put in jail at one point in time and lost his 5 yr old daughter in the process.. he has withstood the lathi charges of firangs and even some Indians who worked for the britishes (i dont blame them though.. food for one's family becomes more important than freedom sometimes)!! he fought more so to free India from the ill-treatment, than the britishes themselves.. If thats the case, I would say we still havent managed to achieve complete freedom cos we are still fighting ill-treatment from our own people..

Many responsibilities are conveniently forgotten for that extra bit of personal gratification either in terms of money, power or ego! Some politicians, like diapers, have to b changed often and worse.. mostly for the same reason!

Wat went wrong in the attitude of our people durin the last 63 years of freedom?
Wat makes them take our freedom for granted when so many of our own blood have shed theirs for our well being?
Wat rights do a few individuals have, to decide whether to share a natural resource with a neighbouring state!?
Wat rights do individuals have to divide the nation in the name of birth right n community?
Wat r the rights, as Indian citizens, have we decided to exercise than complain wat we dont have?
How many of us even respect the national anthem enough to stand up n salute while its being played?
Wat makes some so not proud of the nation that has given them a life and an identity!

It is but human tendency to pursue peace and unite when there is a problem bigger than life! But let us not wait for something bigger than 26/11 happen to unite us whole heartedly!

Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.. so let us learn and overcome the mistakes we've been making individually, as a group, as a community n finally as a nation!

No nation is perfect.. It needs to b MADE perfect.. As Indians, let us face that responsibility.. let our children be proud of us for the future we create for them in this nation..

To My love, My life, My history, My present, My future, My all, My nation.. My India

- JAI HIND!

Can i ask for more?

Am just back from a live concert by Padmashree Begum Parveen Sultana..

Have you ever felt the surge of adnernaline when a far fetched dream becomes reality, enfolding so beautifully right in front of ur eyes? Ever dreamt of getting a flesh and blood darshan of your deity?

My deity was Begum Parveen Sultana and I did get the darshan!!!!

To describe her in a nutshell, when she sings she transcends herself from noun to verb.. Parveen ji is Music herself.. the only vocalist to reach 4 octaves, her bewitching voice modulations and thaans at an unimaginable speed, she has been unbeatable in her empire for the past 50 and odd years..

Ever since my dad introduced me to one of her recordings when i was a teenager, she and her singing has been a distant dream to me.. her renditions so divine and surreal, there have been times ive just day dreamt about how her audience wldve probably reacted during a particular recording..

At her age of 70+, it was the most amazing performances ive ever heard.. her music made me feel so light and pure.. i was just floating.. with her powerful but smooth as butter voice n her PERFECT SA engulfing the entire auditorium, she never gave me one opportunity to touch base.. I learnt today that it is possible indeed to be drugged by music..

With a constant smile on her beautiful face, everything about her on stage was gracious and divine.. she was grounded enough to call her audience as her God and she was just a Pujari, offering her prashad to them.. heights of humility!!!!!

The minute she started with raag Purya Dhanasri with small quips earlier, it is but impossible to sit through the aalaap without a tear rolling down one's cheeks while hearing her efforlessly glide through the notes from athi mantra sthayi(lowest octave), madhya sthayi(middle octave) n finally reaching to a cresendo of tara sthayi (highest octave).. her voice modulations can give instant moksha.. the experience was more spiritual than musical..

As she ended the concert with raag bhirav, the audience gave her a 5 minutes standing ovation and applause.. not enough compared to what she gave us during the 2 hrs concert..

I am blessed to have witnessed her live concert

I am blessed to have been seated right in front of her n hear her sing while she was directly looking at me

I am blessed to have been even considered to play the tambura for her during the show

I am blessed to have been hugged by her

I was blessed by none other than my Goddess of music herself..

Can i ask for more?