A right to live - 1

Bombay's Nightmare... India's Shame!

From all the news, its obvious that the terrorists achieved wat they wanted to do... wat they love doing... terrorize humanity... terrorize the whole 'country'... though their plan actually failed in blowing up The Taj Mahal Hotel! thank God!!

People who went out to have a good time no more have the courage to venture outside ... people near the nariman house think twice about staying home... You can plot an escape plan in a war... but how could u plan an escape from an accident? how could u plan to not b "A lost innocent life"?

The society that was pain stakingly built for the past 1000s of yrs is being shattered right in front of our eyes... a wrongly built society around the world... note: nothing wrong with the culture, but lots with the society... ofcourse, Iam society to the rest of the soceity right?! but how could u try curing fever when there is a deeper problem prevalent in the body?!

The problem is much deeper than any of us may want to expect...

our society is falling apart!

Its old order, discipline, morality, religion, everything has been found to b wrongly based… it has just lost its power over people’s conscience… terrorism simply symbolizes that to destroy human beings doesn’t really matter… that there is nothing in human beings that is indestructible… that its all just matter!

The nations r irrelevant now bcoz of all the nuclear weapons… if the whole world can b destroyed within minutes, the alternative can only b that the whole world shld b together… now it cannot remain divided; its division is dangerous coz division can become war any moment!

Only one war is enough to destroy everything n there is not much time left to understand that we shld create a world where the very possibility of war doesn’t exist!!!!

Terrorism has many undercurrents… one is that, bcos of the nuclear weapons, the nations r pouring their energy into that field, thinking that the old weapons are out of date… they r out of date indeed, but cant individuals start using them?? N u cannot launch nuclear wars against individuals coz that wld simply b stupid… one individual terrorist throws a bomb n it certainly does not justify for a nuclear missile to b sent…

Wat I want to emphasize here is that, nuclear weapon has given individual people a certain kind of freedom to use those old weapons… a freedom which was not possible during olden days n that’s coz the govts were also using the same weapons! N the same govts concentrate on destroying these weapons by either throwing them into the ocean or selling them to countries which r poor n cannot afford nuclear weapons… n if u had noticed, all these terrorists come mainly from these poor countries…

They also have a strange protection… as I said earlier, u cannot use nuclear weapons against them… u just cannot throw atom bombs at them! But they can throw bombs at u, n a country that has gone ahead with being secure in the nuclear weapons front has become ‘impotent’… the same applies to US… the most powerful country in the world is still solving the 9/ 11 incident! We have a vast amount of atom bombs n nuclear bombs in our hands but to no avail… sometimes where a needle is useful, a sword may not b of any use! N ppl who have the sword need not necessarily b in a superior position to the man who has a needle…

Now the terrorist has a great power even over the greatest powers… he can throw bombs at the Twin Tower, at the white house, at the Taj Mahal hotel n at our parliament without any fear, coz wat we have is too big n we cant really throw it back… frankly even if we do throw back the small ones, where r we gonna find him?!

(to b contd...)

Diogenes lived naked, and he was a strong man. Four people who were hijacking people and selling them as slaves in the market thought, "This is a great catch, this man can bring us a lot of money. We have sold many slaves, but none of them were so strong, so beautiful, so young. We can get as high a price as we demand; and there is going to be a great competition in the marketplace when we put this man on the pedestal for sale. But," they thought, "four are not enough to catch him. He alone could kill us all."

Diogenes heard what they were saying about him. He was sitting by the side of the river, just enjoying the cool breeze of the evening, underneath a tree; and behind the tree those four were planning what to do. He said, "Don't be worried. Come here! You need not worry that I will kill you, I never kill anything. And you need not worry that I will fight, resist you—no. I don't fight anybody, I don't resist anything. You want to sell me as a slave?"

Embarassed, afraid, those four people said, "That's what we were thinking. We are poor... if you are willing."

He said, "Of course I am. If I can help you in your poverty in some way, it is beautiful."So they brought out chains. He said, "Throw them in the river; you need not chain me. I will walk ahead of you. I don't believe in escaping from anything. In fact, I am getting excited about the idea of being sold, standing on a high pedestal, and hundreds of people trying to get me. I am excited about this auction—I am coming!"

These four people became a little more afraid: this man is not only strong and beautiful, he seems to be mad also; he could be dangerous. But now there was no way for them to escape. Diogenes said, "If you try to escape, you will be risking your own life. Just follow me, all four of you. Put me on the pedestal in the market."

Unwillingly, they followed him. They wanted to take him, but he went ahead of them! He told those people, "DOn't be afraid, and don't try to escape. You have given me a great idea, I am grateful to you. This is my responsibility; I am going to the marketplace. You put me up for auction.

"What type of man was this?" they wondered. But there was no way to back out now, so they followed him. And when he was put on a high pedestal so that everybody could see, there was almost silence, pin-drop silence. People had never seen such a proportionate body, so beautiful—as if made of steel, so strong.

Before the auctioneer said anything, Diogenese declared, "Listen people! Here is a master to be sold to any slave, because these four poor people need money. So start the auction, but remember, you are purchasing a master."

A king purchased him. Of course, he could do it—more and more money he offered at the auction. Many people were interested but finally a sum, larger than any that had ever been heard of before, was given to those four people. Diogenes said to them, "Are you happy now? You can leave now, and I will go with this slave."

On the way to the palace as they were riding in the chariot, the king said to Diogenes, "Are you crazy or something? You think yourself a master? I am a king, and you think me a slave?"

Diogenes said, "Yes, and I am not crazy, but you are crazy. I can prove it right now." At the back of the chariot was the queen. Diogenes said, "Your queen is already interested in me, she is finished with you. It is dangerous to purchase a master."

The king was shocked. Of course, he was nothing in comparison to Diogenes. The king took out his sword and asked his queen, "What he is saying, is it true? If you say the truth, your life will be saved—that is my promise. But if you say an untruth, and I find it out later on, I will behead you."

Fearful, afraid, still the queen said, "It is true. Before him, you are nothing. I am enchanted, allured; the man has some magic. You aare just a poor guy compared to him. This is the truth."

Of course, the king stopped the chariot and told Diogenes, "Get out of the chariot. I set you free; I don't want to take such risks in my palace."

Diogenes said, "Thank you. I am a man who cannot be made a slave, for the simple reason that every responsibility I take on myself. I have not left those four people feeling guilty—they did not bring me there, I came of my own accord. They must be feeling obliged. And it is your chariot, if you want me to get out, that is perfectly good. I am not accustomed to chariots at all, my legs are strong enough. I am a naked man, a golden chariot does not fit with me."

Moral of the story: No one asked Diogenes this question

"Machi... Nee ivlooooo pesariye... Jetti Potiyaa!?"

FINDING AND KEEPING A LIFE PARTNER.

Golden rules for finding your life partner by Dov Heller, M.A.. Got this as a fwd n it made complete sense in today's world... my only say is, flings mayb awesome but as long as both of u know the deal... dont fool each other in a rship saying its serious but then treating it like a fling...

When it comes to making the decision about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake.Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50%, it appears that many are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr. /Miss. Right! If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting married,they'll say:"We're in love".

I believe this is the #1 mistake people make when they date. Choosing alife partner should never be based on love.*Though this may sound "not politically correct", there's a profound truth here. Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then the love will come. Let me say it again: "You can't build a lifetime relationship on love alone". You need a lot more!!!

Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious aboutfining and keeping a life partner.

*QUESTION 1: Do we share a common life purpose?*
Why is this so important? Let me put it this way:If you're married for 20 or 30 years, that's a long time to live withsomeone. What do you plan to do with each other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together? You need to share something deeper and moremeaningful.You need a common life purpose.Two things can happen in a marriage:(1)You can grow together, or(2)You can grow apart.50% of the people out there are growing apart. To make a marriage work,you need to know what you want out of life! Bottom line; and marry someone who wants the same thing.

*QUESTION 2: Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with thisPerson?*
This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship.Feelingsafe means you can communicate openly with this person. The basis ofhaving good communication is trust - i.e. trust that I won't get"punished"; orhurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings. Be honest with yourself on this one.Make sureyou feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to marry.

*QUESTION 3: Is he/she a mensch?*
A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person. How can youtest? Here are some suggestions. Do they work on personal growth on aregular basis? Are they serious about improving themselves? A teacherofmine defines a good person as "someone who is always striving to be goodand do the right ". So ask your significant other what do they do withtheirtime? Is this person materialistic? Usually a materialistic person isnotsomeone whose top priority is character refinement.There are essentially two types of people in the world:(1)People who are dedicated to personal growth, and(2) People who are dedicated to seeking comfort.Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will put personalcomfortahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that before walkingdownthe aisle.

*QUESTION 4: How does he/she treat other people?*
The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is theability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another personpleasure.Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they wrapped up in themselves and self-absorbed? To measure this, thinkabout the following:*How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such aswaiters, bus boys, taxi drivers, etc.*How do they treat their parents and siblings?*Do they have gratitude and appreciation? If they don't have gratitudeforthe people who have given them everything; can you do nearly as much forthem? You can be sure that someone who treats others poorly willeventually treat you poorly as well.

*QUESTION 5: Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this personafterwe're married?*
Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intentionoftrying to "improve" them after they're married. As a colleague of mineputsit, "You can probably expect someone to change after marriage for theworse". If you cannot fully accept this person the way they are now,thenyou are not ready to marry them.In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous.

The key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart.It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating; so be sure to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues. Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on your finger, you don't want to find yourself in trouble because you didn't do your homework.

*Another perspective...There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance...It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere relationships. Observe the relationships around you.*Pay attention... Which ones lift and which ones lean? Which ones encourage and which ones discourage? Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going down hill? When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse? Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or appreciate you?*The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and truth around you...the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sitinthe front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.

*An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes open,and after you marry, close one eye". Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let lust, pity, desperation, immaturity,ignorance, pressure from others or a low self-esteem make you blind to warning signs. Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change someone or that what you see as faults aren't really that important.Do you bring out the best in each other? Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete, compare and control?

What do you bring to the relationship? Do you bring past relationships, past hurt,past mistrust, past pain?You can't take someone to the altar to alter them. You can't make someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life"; you won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your pain. Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a relationship.

WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG ARE:
TRUST*
COMMUNICATION
INTIMACY
A SENSE OF HUMOR
SHARING TASKS
SOME GET AWAY TIME WITHOUT BUSINESS OR CHILDREN
DAILY EXCHANGES (meal, shared activity, hug, call, touch, notes)*
SHARING COMMON GOALS AND INTERESTS
GIVING EACH OTHER SPACE TO GROW WITHOUT FEELING INSECURE*
GIVING EACH OTHER A SENSE OF BELONGING AND ASSURANCES OF COMMITMENT*

If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as resentment withdrawal, abuse, neglect, and dishonesty; and pain will replace it.